A few readers agreed with my column that Fox Sports went gushing about Florida quarterback Tim Tebow, particularly for his off-the-field activities, during its telecast of the BCS national championship game. My colleagues also forwarded me a few items they had run across:
A text from Kerrie Green of Norman:
Seriously? Did they just say he lived in a leper colony? Who can beat Jesus? … On the way into the stadium, he prayed with the prostitutes; during the game he fed the crowd with only 2 hot dogs and 1 beer.
Today: Tebow is skipping his senior year and ascending directly into Heaven.
From Mark Boren, who has a batchelor’s degree and a master’s degree in chemical engineering from OU:
“Do you know Tim Tebow is a wonderful person? Did you hear the speach he gave after the loss to Ole Miss? He said…. Let’s listen to Tim Tebow’s speech since I just can’t talk about it enough.” … This was not the game for the national championship. This was the build up Tim Tebow night.
Bob and Judy Henry:
I read your article about the FOX announcers. Here’s the deal. Mr. Brennaman made those mistakes for the benefit of the OU fans. They felt like they were listening to Bob Barry.
Tebow entered the press room to wild applause. A reporter for a 24- hour cable sports network burst into tears when the 2007 Heisman winner entered the room. Another threw a pair of boxer shorts on the podium. Tebow smiled at the gesture and several sports reporters fainted.
“Sorry I’m late,” Tebow began. “There was a six-year-old boy with cancer in row 54 and I had to make my way through the crowd to heal him.”
“I want to start by saying that playing quarterback for the University of Florida, winning two national championships, has been a great honor. There has been some speculation about my future and I want to clear that up right now,” he continued.
“Don’t go, Tim!” a reporter shouted from the back of the room.
“After much consideration, I have decided to skip my senior season at the University of Florida and ascend directly into Heaven,” Tebow announced. Upon making the announcement, Tebow was bathed in a
blinding white light and vanished.
In response to the news, ESPN announced they will have a month-long tribute to Tebow. ESPN2 will now be known as ESPN-TEBOW and will feature Tebow highlights (including home videos of Tebow’s childhood), re-airings of past interviews, Tebow-centric analysis by ESPN air personalities, a Tebow quiz show and a reality show to find the “most Tebow-like” person in America. “He wasn’t just the greatest player in college football history,” said a college football writer at the press conference, tears streaming down his face. “He might have been the greatest person to ever walk on earth.”