Kam Gamble and Guilford Gardens
Kam Gamble talks about her garden and parties on Parties Extra!
20-40-60 Etiquette—Manners in the metro?
YOU ASK! WE ANSWER! YOU DECIDE!
QUESTION: When I was young, there was a children etiquette course entitled, “white gloves and party manners. ” It taught girls about hygiene, table manners, phone etiquette. Our youngest is 14 and manners are not taught, but expected at this age..Is there anything available in the OKC area?
CALLIE’S ANSWER: I googled it and couldn’t come up with anything. Keep asking around and always remember that you are her role model.
LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: You’re in luck. There are a lot of people in Oklahoma City who care about manners as much as you do, and several who are making sure that today’s children’s grow up knowing how to relate to someone face to face instead of via text, as well as how to act in certain social situations. I, too, took an etiquette class from Jane White when I was young and I believe I remember doing something similar at Dillard’s at Penn Square Mall.
My parents wanted to give me a good foundation, for which I am grateful. They’re also supportive of giving my own children one; two of my children are participating this fall — one for the second year – in Carey Sue Vega’s National League of Junior Cotillion classes, which are both in Oklahoma City and Edmond for a variety of ages.
I also have heard that etiquette is taught as a special event for middle school students at certain schools in Edmond, but I don’t know any details. Also, if your child isn’t up for a class, then check out the “American Girl” series of books, which go far beyond the dolls that made the brand famous. Offerings include books on hygiene, friendship, staying organized, Internet safety, surviving tricky situations and even an etiquette one: “A Smart Girl’s Guide to Manners.”
HELEN’S ANSWER: You can watch the newspaper for etiquette classes in Oklahoma City. Sometimes department stores have classes scheduled for manners. There are cotillion classes for dance and social manners taught by Carey Sue Vega. In the class students learn social skills at formal dinners as well as conversation skills.
Some of our own guests on 20-40-60 have taught various classes in manners. Hilarie Blaney taught a White Gloves and Party Manners type class for middle school and high school students. Devonne Carter has taught etiquette classes to Girl Scouts and seniors. Kate Stanton has made etiquette presentations to nonprofit groups, college student organizations, academic programs, Girl Scout troops and birthday parties.
Everyday manners should still be taught in the home at an early age. Children never forget if they learn where to place a napkin on the table and what order the forks, spoons and knives go. Cutting meat is an important skill for a child.
GUEST’S ANSWER: Kate Stanton: Executive Director, Health Sciences Center Student Affairs, The University of Oklahoma, and etiquette consultant. With the ridiculous use of electronic devices at the dinner table and ear phones in children’s ears as they walk into a building, I can only imagine the difficulty involved in ensuring manners in our youth today. While I do not know of any courses or classes taught (and hate to promote if I’m not 110% familiar), I do encourage you and other parents to grasp arms and tackle the need(s) before you.
Consider crafting a simple curriculum on table manners, phone etiquette, gracious living, and more. Possibly you and other parents share the teaching roles on alternate days centered on meal time or during the hottest hours of the day.
Consider opening up your teacher pool to include mothers, fathers, good friends and grandparents. Teach simple acts of kindness such as: opening doors, saying thank you, and asking someone how their day is going and waiting to hear the response. Kindness should never be limited to a 4-week class as it should be a way of life.
Above all remember this: you are your child’s first and most important teacher. Be a good example…put down your own phone when eating (and while talking), write thank you notes together after opening presents, and volunteer together to help those around us. Perspective can be one of the best teachers of etiquette and gracious living. My response not only makes me consider opening up a side business for our young people, but remain more than grateful for my Mother who made us into vessels of appropriateness.
Callie Gordon, a college senior, was an Oklahoma City 2009 debutante. Lillie-Beth Brinkman is a former debutante and currently the assistant features editor for The Oklahoman. Helen Wallace has written a social column for The Oklahoman for many years and has been on various local Ball committees. Guest is Kate Stanton who has made etiquette presentations to nonprofit groups, college student organizations, academic programs, Girl Scout troops and birthday parties.
This group does not always agree (via age differences), but they ALL see the need for proper behavior.
Ask a specific etiquette question and you will get three answers…Then you decide for yourself how you would handle the situation. The answers have information for every age range….Callie is 20-ish; Lillie-Beth is 40-something, and Helen is 60-plus.
Please email us with your questions and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and daily blogs. We will try to answer your etiquette questions weekly on the Parties Extra! blog. Sometimes we will ask other people for their opinions.
Look for us!
E-mail us! helen.wallace@cox.net …lbrinkman@opubco.com…calliezok3@aol.com
Parties Extra! —Women for Oklahoma State University meet in Oklahoma City
Ann Hargis, Lela Sullivan, Suzanne Spradling, Susan Dobson were at Gaillardia Golf and Country Club. (Photo by David Faytinger).
A reception was held at Gaillardia Golf and Country Club recently for Women for Oklahoma State University, a group of alumni and friends of the university. Becky Steen, Edmond, was hostess.
Vice chairman of Women for OSU Trish Houston Prawl welcomed the group and introduced Provost Robert Sternberg who gave an update about the Stillwater campus. Chairman Phyllis Hudecki was unable to attend.
Among the guests were Pat Moline, Jennifer Grigsby, Ramona Paul, Jeannette Sias, Vicki Gourley, Janice Teggins Gibson, Gwen Shaw, Natalie Shirley, Shirley Rolston.
Chi Omega alumni members meet for lunch
Barbara Brown, Carole Pyle, Susan Rutherford, Dan McGuire, Jane Ellen Weaver, back, and Cherry Kay Clifford, BJ Robinson, seated, were at the Chi Omega luncheon. (Photo by David Faytinger).
Cherry Kay Clifford was hostess to University of Oklahoma Chi Omega alumni from the 1960’s. Friends brought salads to share and guests were greeted with Mimosas. Co-hostesses were BJ Robinson, Susan Rutherford, Jane Ellen Weaver, Barbara Brown, Dana McGuire, Gayle Larimore and Marilyn Williams.
Tables were decorated with black French wire baskets with sunflowers, red Gerber daisies and red berries (sorority colors are cardinal and straw) and a daisy was set at each place for guests to take home.
Joy Reed Belt and M.J. Van Deventer entertain at brunch
M.J. Van Deventer, right, welcomes Narda and Jim Wilcox to the party. (Photos by Helen Ford Wallace).
Joy Reed Belt and M.J. Van Deventer were hosts for a brunch at the JRB Art at the Elms Gallery. Some of the artists participating in the National Cowboy Prix de West Show attended.
On the menu was scrambled eggs, bacon, fruit, chicken salad, deviled eggs, biscuits and M.J.’s rum cake and a chocolate rum cake.
Guests included Narda and Jim Wilcox, Lisa Meridian, George Hallmark, Peggy and Bill Anton, Randal Dutra, Ross Matteson, Eldridge Hardie, Sonya and Mark Terpening, Sherry and Herb Mignery and Shirley Thomson-Smith, Lisa Hallmark, Janie and Bill Deupree, Joan Gilmore, Al McLaughlin, Meg Salyer, Irma Elliott, Karen and John Klinka, Dr. Terry Clark, Carolyn Leonard and Michi Susan.
Joy Reed Belt and Linda Haneborg enjoy the event.
Oklahoma City’s Lakehurst Neighborhood has a “Facelift At Fifty!”
SoRelle Fitzgerald talks about Lakehurst Neighborhood on Parties Extra!
Fabulous Finds!—Julie Tibbs finds a home for her “re-claimed objects!”
Julie Tibbs shows her kitchen table, one of her favorite finds. (Photo by Zach Gray).
Julie Tibbs on video.
This little guy was on the curb by the OK Museum of Art downtown. He was starving, covered in fleas and his little paws were burned. Just like all my treasures, he cleaned right up and got a second chance. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
Article by Helen Ford Wallace ….Photos by Zach Gray and Julie Tibbs…Video by AJ Sinker
Julie Tibbs is helping the environment one chair at a time. She is also single- handedly holding down landfill additions by bringing home curbside rejects such as sofas, chests, lamps and re-purposing them for her own home use. She takes things that nobody wants and turns them into things that everybody wants.
Recently on a trip to Austin, she found a darling blue chest of drawers on the curb. Some of the wood from the drawers were missing, and the entire chest really needed a good scrubbing with soap and water, so she cleaned it up and it was ready for use. Tibbs just has a flair for continual re-decorating with yesterday’s furniture. She always finds something usable in her quests.
She also found a lamp and turned it into a nature work of art. It is covered in bark, moss and pine cones. It’s one of this curbside forager’s best finds of discarded material.
An old chair needed a little repair and she upholstered it with an old pajama top. She also used one of her skirts that she loved and could not part with as fabric for one of her projects. She “found” a leather love seat and a kitchen table and chairs, which have places of honor in her Nichols Hills home.
Her daughter, Claire Tibbs, lives in Austin, Texas, and 80 per cent of her house is furnished with family antiques, vintage items or curb finds “We found fabulous things in Austin recently. They have ‘Trash Day’ two times a year,” Tibbs said. Another daughter, Bonnie Tibbs, does not share the “reclaiming objects” passion.
Actually Claire started finding broken things that were easily fixed when she lived in Chicago. She found them on the curb while she was walking home from work. “Most of the items needed little repairs, but the people didn’t know what to do with them so they threw them out and Claire and I started appreciating these discarded objects,” she added. “She got me started on collecting.”
The recycling project is addictive. Julie Tibbs and Claire Tibbs call it “pickin.” Julie’s mother-in-law, Ann Tibbs, has joined the fun. “It’s always a work in progress, “Julie Tibbs said. She also added that you must have no shame in collecting. “Pride does get in some people’s way, so it’s not for everyone. You must have open eyes and must train your eyes to see things you might want as you are driving by.
Tibbs noted that some of her best finds are in the worst neighborhoods. In many places, people sell their furniture on Craig’s List when they want to get rid of it or have it hauled off to the Salvation Army. Most of the high-end neighborhoods don’t have a big “Trash Day.”
“I am not into garage sales since that is out of my price range and I am used to finding stuff for free, “ Julie Tibbs noted. Many of the items in Julie and Brian Tibbs’ home are family antiques from her grandmother and his parents, she added. “And Claire took some of those home with her too.” At a recent party the Tibbs decorated their backyard with some of the curb items, including a bed, table and chairs and a television. Their garage was a pretend living room with a sofa, lamp and chairs. Strings of lights added to the ambience.
When asked how she got into the “Trash to Treasures” mode, Julie Tibbs answered: “Claire and I grew up with hand-me- downs. I got stuff from my older sister and Claire had hand-me-downs from her cousin. Claire did have a “new” prom dress (a heavy detailed fabric slip) that we got at a vintage shop and it was beautiful. We just think older is cooler than new,” she said.
Another table in the Tibbs home with mis-matched chairs. (Photo by Zach Gray).
This is my pride and joy. I found a old lamp on the curb and covered it with things I picked up in the country. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
I found these rockers, spray painted them and add some hand me down pillows. Nice. Right? (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
Again, doors make good tables. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
Pretend living room that I staged in the garage. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
I think I need to find an upgrade for this chair and return this one to the curb. The foot stool is a little camel saddle that was in a dumpster. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
I even found a screen door. I love the way it slams. It is the door to Brian’s man cave but that’s a whole other story. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
If you find an old window, it can hold some photos. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
Gave this dumpster ” find” a new life. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs).
Pretend bedroom in the yard for a party. Notice the vintage tv with rabbit ears. (Photo and cutline by Julie Tibbs.)
20-40-60 Etiquette—Thank you! No… Thank you!
YOU ASK! WE ANSWER! YOU DECIDE
QUESTION: Should I write a thank you note for a thank you gift. Recently, three friends gave me a gift for something that I did for them. I loved it and thought I should write them a thank you too. But, is it enough to SAY how much I appreciated it?
CALLIE’S ANSWER: My family has an inside joke about this, “thank you for thankin’ me.” A simple phone call is perfect! If you do anything more then it gets to be excessive.
LILLIE-BETH’S ANSWER: Theoretically, you could end up caught in a never ending circle of thank-yous. Since we began writing 20-40-60 etiquette almost two years ago, people have asked various questions about thank-you notes, such as how properly thank someone who made you a nice meal or how many people to thank for an invitation to an event. So, add to this list of etiquette concerns the thank-you note for a thank-you gift. Whew!
I think in this case, if you’ve thanked the givers in person for the lovely gift that they gave you in appreciation for something, then everyone involved has handled the occasion graciously — you for kind gesture in the first place, them for acknowledging it and then you again with gratitude. And you can build friendships with such generosity, respect and friendship, which, apparently, you already have.
HELEN’S ANSWER: If you opened your thank you gift in the presence of your friends and told them how much you loved it, I think that is sufficient. They know by watching your actions that you liked it. If your friends were not there when you got the gift, then you should call each one of them immediately and tell them thank you. Thank yous are still important to all of us.
GUEST’S ANSWER: Yvette Walker, Night News Editor, The Oklahoman: Answer: Sure, why not? A card or letter telling your friends how thoughtful they were is never a bad thing. As long as YOU don’t buy a thank you gift for the thank you gift for the thank you gift. And so on … and so on … and so on …
Callie Gordon, a college senior, was an Oklahoma City 2009 debutante. Lillie-Beth Brinkman is a former debutante and currently the assistant features editor for The Oklahoman. Helen Wallace has written a social column for The Oklahoman for many years and has been on various local Ball committees. Guest is Yvette Walker, Night News Editor, The Oklahoman.
This group does not always agree (via age differences), but they ALL see the need for proper behavior.
Ask a specific etiquette question and you will get three answers…Then you decide for yourself how you would handle the situation. The answers have information for every age range….Callie is 20-ish; Lillie-Beth is 40-something, and Helen is 60-plus.
Please email us with your questions and follow us on Facebook, Twitter and daily blogs. We will try to answer your etiquette questions weekly on the Parties Extra! blog. Sometimes we will ask other people for their opinions.
Look for us!
E-mail us! helen.wallace@cox.net …lbrinkman@opubco.com…calliezok3@aol.com
Carol Troy honored at birthday party!
Polly Nichols, Sue Ann Hyde, Gene Barth, Dudley Hyde, Kathy Walker, Karen Browne were at the birthday party. (Photos by David Faytinger).
Mac and Carol Troy, Russ Walker celebrate Carol’s birthday.
Carol Troy was honored at a birthday party at Trochta’s Flowers. The event was in the Greenhouse and Showroom. Invitations featured flower seeds so guests could plant their own flower gardens. Attire for the evening was “garden casual” and Larry Brannon was caterer for the buffet dinner.
Hosts for the party were Gene and Ed Barth, Karen and Bob Browne, Sue Ann and Dudley Hyde, Polly and Larry Nichols, Charlotte and John Richels and Kathy and Russ Walker. They gave the honoree a swinging garden chair imprinted with a butterfly.
Jill Justice played the harp and Polly Nichols and Karen Browne read a poem called “The Swing” by Robert Louis Stevenson.
Among the guests were Dee Colley, Annie Bohanon, Joan and Rod Frates, Gennie Johnson, Kirk and Royce Hammons, Karen and Rob Luke, Ann and Bob Gilliland, Lori and Dodge Hill, Janie Kimball, Ann Alspaugh, Jim Vallion and Jamie and Gil Gaddis.
Parties Extra!—Oklahoma City Beautiful Golf Tournament held at The Oklahoma City Golf & Country Club
Michael Joseph, Lisa Synar, Dick Marshall were at the Mayors Golf Tournament. (Photo by David Faytinger).
The Oklahoma City Beautiful Mayors Golf Tournament was at the Oklahoma City Golf and Country Club and a reception was held afterwards.
Among the players were Bill Rodgers, Ron Bradshaw, Ike Bennett, Bill Bell, Ron Norick and Tim O’Toole, David Stanley, Joe Womack, David Harlow, Homer Paul, Doug Fuller, John, Paul and Jimmie Austin, Dick Workman, Lee Bollinger.
The team from Rococ0′s Restaurant had matching red golf shirts. McAfee and Taft Law Firm sponsored the party.
During the golf tournament Mick Cornett and Jim Norick had their pictures made with every team. Cornett hit a tee short with each group using their club and ball.
