20-40-60—Etiquette question and answers
Parties Extra! ....New Year's photo from Party Galaxy Web Site...For Etiquette Question and Answers...20-40-60
ETIQUETTE QUESTION…This question came to us from reader e-mail.
YOU ASK—WE ANSWER—YOU DECIDE!
Your question: Let’s talk about text messages. Can you invite someone over by texting them? Can you break up with someone via text? Is it rude to be texting when you are out to dinner or at someone’s house? How do you use texting? Do you need to use proper grammar when texting?
Lillie-Beth’s answer: I like texting. It’s a great way to do things like finalize plans, hire a sitter or connect with someone you care about when you don’t have time to talk. Depending on the situation, I don’t think it’s wrong to invite a friend you see regularly over for a casual dinner via text, although a phone call is better, and I have had some good conversations, even, via text. But I hate it when the flow of a conversation that I’m having in person gets interrupted so someone can respond to a text. In that case, the mobile phone becomes more important than the person standing right there.
And I can’t imagine ending a relationship via text; to me, that’s just a wimpy way of avoiding a difficult part of living. Texting isn’t a substitute for real-life relationships; I’d rather develop those in person instead of using a method that only lets you talk in less than 160 characters at a time. And the 40-year-old journalist in me likes using proper grammar unless my text gets too long.
Callie’s answer: I invite people over via text all the time! You can send out a mass text to everyone, if at the last minute, you want to have people over, or even to change the time for your dinner reservations, or if you’re running late to a dinner.
When breaking up with someone, NO WAY! You can NOT break up with someone via text OR, over the phone, for that matter! RUDE!
I text in all different ways. I can send something quick like “I’m on my way,” or even to make plans for later. I text when I am bored.
I make sure that I spell everything out on my text. It bugs me so bad when people use slang or “R U.” JUST SPELL OUT THE WORD! Not hard!
Texting at dinner or at someone’s house depends on the situation. If it is a casual dinner with your friends, no big deal. If you don’t have someone to talk to at a party, and you get a text, go for it! Usually, what you think is appropriate will be ok.
Helen’s answer: Since I don’t always check my phone or have it with me, a text requiring an instant answer might not get to me. If you are inviting me somewhere, you may not hear from me until the next day.
I do love text messages during football games or at times when I don’t want to take time for a long conversation. A few choice comments are always welcome. Shortened code words are lost on me.
At dinner, I don’t have my cell nearby, and I try to leave it in the car if I am at someone’s house or at a restaurant. It is a little disturbing when younger people have their phones in their hands at the table watching for a constant update and then returning the message while trying to carry on a conversation live.
Actually, to communicate with your friends is awesome….in any form.
(Callie Gordon, a college sophomore, is a debutante this year and has been in many new social situations recently. Lillie-Beth Brinkman is a former debutante and currently the assistant features editor for The Oklahoman. Helen Wallace has written a social column for The Oklahoman for many years and has been on various local Ball committees.
This group does not always agree (via age differences), but they ALL see the need for proper behavior.)
Ask a specific etiquette question and you will get three answers…Then you decide for yourself how you would handle the situation. The answers have information for every age range….Callie is 20-something; Lillie-Beth is 40-something, and Helen is 60-something.
Please email us with your questions and be sure to follow us on Facebook, Twitter and daily blogs. We will try to answer your etiquette questions weekly on the Parties Extra! blog. Sometimes we will ask other people for their opinions. Look for us!
helen.wallace@cox.net…lbrinkman@opubco.com… calliezok3@aol.com
Happy New Year from 20-40-60!
25 favorites from 2009
Here is a list (#1-25) of things that made me smile in 2009…my favorites for the year….it has been fun to look back….HFW
My favorites:
1.Oklahoman readers and NewsOk viewers for party coverage. We are thankful for everyone who reads about parties.
2. A growing family.
3. Bennett Brinkman won first place in a December essay contest. (Photo from Edmond Sun.)
4. Angi Bruss interviewed Pioneer Woman about her wonderful new cookbook. 
5. Blogger Sarah James and her graciousness on Parties Extra! (Click here for Sarah’s video).
6. The Gaylord Prize luncheon and the high tech coverage. 
7. A beautiful Beaux Arts Ball with beautiful flowers and a crown theme. 
8. Reminder of thankfulness and pumpkin pie from POW Patty Stephens. (Click here for Patty’s video on NewsOk).
9. The Heart Rhythm Institute luncheon and all of the volunteers. 
10. Jose Freede and her famous Andrew Hamilton Crawford bracelets.
11. Ann Kilpatrick and the Commodore’s banquet. (Click here for Ann’s story). 
12. The 20-40-60 gang and guests and their etiquette responses. (Latest blog post). 
13. Chesapeake’s Christmas lights on Western. 
14. Braum’s ice cream flavors.
15. Hatch chilies from New Mexico.
16. Creating gingerbread houses.
17. Kate Stanton’s sip- and -see party for her niece.
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18. Paige, center, our favorite bride, with family members. 
19. A trip to the American Girl store in Dallas with Ella. 
20. Earth ships in Taos, New Mexico.
21. Backyard patio lighted for the holidays. 
22. North Carolina in the fall.
23. Miniature poinsettias for the holidays.
24. Rossi, the therapy dog. (Click here to read about Rossi and owner Judy Savage). 
25. A wonderful man!
HAPPY NEW YEAR TO YOU! YAHOO 2010! HFW
Lobsters arrive in time for holiday luncheon in Oklahoma City
The birthday/luncheon group met for lobsters in the home of Kanela Huff. (Photos by Helen Ford Wallace).
A group of women who get together for birthday lunches met in the home of Kanela Huff for a lobster luncheon in honor of Pam Smith’s birthday. Hostesses were Huff and Brooke Phillips.
Rawsie Boyles and Sue Magness cooked the very active lobsters in huge pans. Guests gathered at tables with their silver picks and lobster crackers and pitchers of melted butter and lemon. There were also accompanying dishes of salad, potatoes, green beans and Christmas cutout cookies and lobster cookies brought by Barbara Dahnke, Judy Lehmbeck and Lisa Voegeli.
Each guest brought $10. worth of scratch off lottery tickets for a gift exchange. They were asked to have the tickets in “fabulous wrap” and prizes were given for the best gift wrapping.
Pam Smith models one of her birthday presents.
The tables looked very festive.
Delta Delta Delta “Art With A Heart” art show benefits Oklahoma Children’s Cancer Association
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Patient/artists Paige and Holly paint for the Delta Delta Delta art show. (Photo provided).
The 8th annual Delta Delta Delta “Art With A Heart” art show is Feb. 26th from 7 until 9 p.m. at the Oklahoma History Center.
Children receiving treatment at the Jimmy Everest Center for Cancer and Blood Disorders at Children’s Hospital are creating the artwork during art therapy sessions. The art will be available at a silent auction.
The young artists will come to the art show and be recognized for their accomplishments.
Proceeds benefit Oklahoma Children’s Cancer Association.
Tickets are $30. Hors d’oeuvres and a cash bar will be available. For information, contact co-chairmen of the silent auction, Claudia Robertson, 405-823-3080, or Kacey Luster, 405-205-6367, or visit www.artwithaheartokc.com
The Oklahoma City University Societies members view plaques in OCU’s Claire Jones Administration Building
One of the plaques at Oklahoma City University’s Claire Jones Administration Building. This one honored Linda Garrett. (Photo by Helen Ford Wallace).
These plaques hanging on the wall were in honor or Lou Kerr and Linda Kennedy Rosser.
A Provost Holiday Reception was held on the campus of Oklahoma City University in the Claire Jones Administration Building.
Hosts were members of The Societies of OCU and Provost Bernie Patterson. The Provost invited all the members of the OCU Societies for a viewing of the honoree plaques which hang in the administration building.
The placques, dated from 1988-2009, were given at the Awards of Excellence Ball and the former Mardi Gras Ball.
The 2010 OCU Societies Awards of Excellence is Feb. 20 at the Oklahoma City Golf and Country Club. Judy Love is chairman; Kirk Hammons is co-chairman, and Cathy Leichter is Societies President.
Gene Barth and Judy Love view plaques at the reception.
Parties Extra—Happy December 25th—Merry Christmas
Check out Bakerella’s Web Site for a joyously- decorated party….www.bakerella.com/
Merry Christmas. HFW
Sarah James, blogger for Whoorl and Hair Thursday, visits NewsOk studio
Sarah James, Los Angeles, talks with Helen about holiday party hair-dos.
Sarah filmed and produced a video with her dad. She called it “The Candy Man.”
It is one of my favorites. Happy Holidays!
20-40-60—Etiquette Question and Answers
ETIQUETTE QUESTION: This question came to us during a holiday party.
YOU ASK—WE ANSWER —YOU DECIDE!
Your Question: I love the glitz of the holiday season. The more sequins on dresses, the better. The light-up jangly earrings are my favorites. But, I have noticed that not everyone is wearing the bejeweled Christmas sweaters and the beaded, metallic, shimmering dresses to the parties this season. Am I committing a fashion faux pas or am I really making a holiday statement?
Linda’s answer: (Linda Miller is fashion editor of The Oklahoman and has her own fashion blog called “Fashion Matters” on NewsOk.)
You can still shine and shimmer this holiday season without adorning yourself in head-to-toe glitz. Leave that to the Vegas showgirls. What looks more fresh and modern is a sweater with a beaded collar or a top with sequin straps; crystal earrings that reflect the light rather than light up; a matte sequin dress that’s subtle rather than in-your-face shine.
Bejeweled Christmas sweaters are in a class all their own. It’s not a look I have ever liked, but plenty of women do, and nothing anyone says will change their mind. So, go ahead and make a holiday statement. Just adjust the wattage.
Lillie-Beth’s Answer: I’ll defer to The Oklahoman’s Fashion Editor, Linda Miller, for the real answer to this question, but I’ll give it a shot.
I love the glitz of the holiday season, too, and it’s still there — in elementary school, at least. For Christmas caroling the last day before the fall break, I saw it in full force at my children’s school, where the teachers and staff were decked out. They wore an array of glitter and red and green, which of course the young students loved.
As for parties, I have seen ruffles and soft things in stores, which to me are just as much fun as the glitter, albeit understated. However, I just saw the sequins and flash as part of a feature at www.elle.com about what to wear for New Year’s.
Callie’s Answer: I LOVE the sequins this season! If you are asking about the jeweled THEMED sweater, WAY OUT SISTA! But I think only certain people can go all out when wearing sequins! Remember the phrase, “Keep it simple, stupid!” A little bit of glitz goes a long way!
Helen’s answer: I just love the light up, sparkly look! Probably I would wear light-up earrings, necklace, bracelet, along with the bedecked Christmas sweater over a sequined dress. Sounds a bit much, doesn’t it? Well, if I’m not careful, I could add glittery eye shadow and shimmery body lotion, too, because I like the sparkle. To quote a friend, “glitter is good.”
Someone during this party season, wore a beautiful black cocktail suit with a silver sequined shell blouse, and she looked very pretty. So, maybe, this year, glitz could take a vacation. But don’t throw it all away. You never know when there will be a comeback. I did hear about a party last week that the suggested attire on the invitation stated: “Wear your oldest Christmas sweater.”
(Callie, a college sophomore, is a debutante this year and has been in many new social situations recently. Lillie-Beth is a former debutante and currently the assistant features editor for The Oklahoman. Helen has written a social column for The Oklahoman for many years and has been on various local Ball committees.
This group does not always agree (via age differences), but they ALL see the need for proper behavior.)
Ask a specific etiquette question and you will get three answers…Then you decide for yourself how you would handle the situation. The answers have information for every age range….Callie is 20-something; Lillie-Beth is 40-something, and Helen is 60-something.
Please email us with your questions and be sure to follow us on Facebook, Twitter and daily blogs. We will try to answer your etiquette questions weekly on the Parties Extra! blog. Sometimes we will ask other people for their opinions. Look for us!
helen.wallace@cox.net…lbrinkman@opubco.com… calliezok3@aol.com
Parties Extra – Seventy Five club members celebrate the season
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Table at the Seventy Five Club Dance. (Photos by Helen Ford Wallace).
Seventy Five Club members celebrated the season at a dance at the Oklahoma City Golf and Country Club.
Red roses, lilies and mums with silver ribbons, Christmas berries and greenery decorated the tables and the gourmet menu included crab cake and caviar, filet of beef and a chocolate cup with white chocolate mousse and berries. Many of the women wore red dresses.
Partygoers included Linda and Steve Garrett, Jane and Paul Austin, Jane and David Thompson, Cynda and Larry Ottaway, Jeary and Mike Seikel, Sue Ann and Dudley Hyde, Gennie and Bob Johnson, Diana and Jeff Beeler and Sandy and Stewart Meyers.
Cynda Ottaway and Marilyn Meade arrive at the party.
Clay and Holly Healey are ready to party.
Jay and Pat Edwards were at the formal event.
Parties Extra! Ho Ho….It is the season!
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Susan Johnston and Judy Love greet guests as they arrive at their Christmas party in the Love home. Hostesses were Love, Johnston and Barbara Brou. (Photos by Helen Ford Wallace).
Judy Love, Barbara Brou and Susan Johnston were hostesses for a holiday party in the Love home which was spectacularly decorated with Santas, Christmas stockings, poinsettias, doll Christmas carolers, nativity scenes and angels.
Glittering trees decorated the food table where a huge array of party foods was served.
It was cold outside and two tall heaters were set at the front door.
Among the guests: Sue Timberlake, Jeaneen Naifeh, Harolyn Enis, Jenee Lister, Joan Gilmore, Karen Luke, Marilyn Meade, Martha Bradshaw, Pam Smith, Laurie Hyde, Penny McCaleb, Sharon Wade, Mary Ann Haskins, SoRelle Fitzgerald, Carol Gann, Pam Shdeed and Carolyn Zachritz.
Barbara Brou and Sharon Wade talk at the holiday party.
Jeaneen Naifeh and Jenee Lister enjoyed the holiday event.
Pam Smith waits for her car by the outdoor heater.
