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Becky Hammon, All-American girl, has turned red, sports fans.

The WNBA star (as if she doesn’t have enough problems) has decided to play point guard for Russia in this year’s Olympics.

Betrayal!! 

She was a star for the New York Liberty for goodness sakes, as now she’s going to be a part of the Red Menace! J. Edgar Hoover must be spinning in his grave.

Wait, what?

 Apparently the Soviet Union broke up a while back. (Mr. Monday was busy to Nirvana’s album - look it up!) And neither band is getting back together.

 Hammon’s decision is fishy. They gave her Russian citizenship since she plays there half the year. But it’s not like her mother escaped from the Gulag or anything.

 Mr. Monday says Hammon needs to play for the U.S.A. or at least Canada. Leave the Soviet alone to dominate Eastern Europe.

 Wait, what?

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* Wesley Snipes is getting three years in jail? Snipes may not be giving it up to Uncle Sam, but Mr. Monday will give it up to him for being in at least three sports classics as well as some Mr. Monday stretches-the-credibility-of-the-sports-angle flicks.

Mr. Monday’s Top 5 Wesley Snipe Good-And-Plenty Movies.

5. Demolition Man (1993): Snipes inspires a decade of bad Dennis Rodman haircuts.

4. New Jack City (1991): Nino Brown is a bad man in 1991. Five years later, Snipes was starring as a crossdresser. Five years after that, he was going straight to DVD. What happened?

3. Wildcats (1986): The beginning of the Wesley Snipes-Woody Harrelson oeuvre. Then they both went nuts.

2. White Men Can’t Jump (1993): What is a quince?

1. Major League (1989): This is either the best of all of the bad sports movies or the worst of the good sports movies. (Mr. Monday considers it Bull Durham’s drunk brother-in-law. “Yo, bartender, Jobu needs a refill.”) Snipes seemed to be enjoying himself in this one, before he turned into a gritty, vampire-hunting action hero with snappy dialogue.

Have fun in prison, Wesley.

Usually Mr. Monday reads this blog and drinks some Pepto. But you got to give it up to someone who writes a funny headline.

“Clay Bennett Really Ought to Just Use the Phone From Now On”

 Read their site if you must, it’s thick with coffee-stained, pro-Seattle yadda yadda.

Mr. Monday’s column got overpowered by the Gods of Limited Space today. Here it is in all of its glory, but if it shows up in the paper again some day, don’t come complaining to me!

Now Mr. Monday doesn’t want to take all the credit for the NBA coming to town, but Mr. Monday does want to strike while the iron is hot.

In other words, there is some business to take are of between now and when

Ford Center starts rocking again come next fall.

First, the issue of paying off the Seattle Scorched Earthers. The owners just need to let Mr. Monday know what help they need in that regard. It’s all good as long as they’ll take a postdated check.

Next is the idea of what to do with the Sonics name, franchise history and logo. Keeping it up in the

Emerald City is fine. No one in the metro wants theFord Center rafters to get crowded. Last week, Gary Payton said he didn’t want his number to be retired in Oklahoma City.

No worries, Glove, your banner would just get in the way of Smokin’ Joe Burton.

Mr. Monday would rather no have to worry about Jack Sikma’s career rebounding total. Mr. Monday has to leave room in the memory banks for “Battlestar Galactica.” It’s a lot easier to figure out that the franchise’s top rebounder is Jeff Green.

Finally, let’s talk about the whole issue of the mascot and jersey in our fair city. As you saw last week, our creative readers had a lot of ideas of their own and most of those were Twisters.

Mr. Monday has let idea known — Oklahoma City Energy. It has an equal balance of pizzazz, uniqueness and kissing up to Aubrey McClendon. If that ends up being the name all Mr. Monday wants is season tickets and a
cush job at 63rd and Western.

Our team needs to put the pedal to the metal about this thing, though. The NBA Draft Lottery ceremony is May 20 and Mr. Monday doesn’t want Clay without 500 miles of any green and gold Sonics gear.

That ceremony would be the perfect place to roll out the new team name and logo — and win the No. 1 pick. That way Michael Beasley would know what he’d be wearing.

If the team can pull off that trick — pay off the squabblers and come up with a new team name — Mr. Monday would be impressed.

Besides, it was Mr. Monday’s idea.

Mr. Monday hasn’t like baseball since midway through Game 6 of the 1985 World Series.
But this made Mr. Monday laugh out loud.
YouTube has turned everyone into a genius.