I ran last night because it’s the only thing that made any sense.
Our friend, Sarah Soles, passed away Tuesday night. She was only 33. It was a shock to say the least. My husband met her two years ago, and I was lucky enough to get to know her, too. She was super smart and so involved in the community, namely with the Oklahoma City Philharmonic. She had so many great qualities, but my favorite was her encouraging nature. If she knew you, she knew about your family, your job, your passions. She always offered words of encouragement to my husband and me with our charity work. She always gave us advice and praised.
She was the kind of person who made you believe in yourself because she believed in you so much.
My husband called me while I was out of the office to tell me that Sarah had passed. I was in such shock. My first reaction was that the doctors should try something drastic to save her, as if it wasn’t already too late. My brain couldn’t understand that she was gone. I still don’t think I can. It doesn’t make any sense. We saw her two weeks ago at a Christmas party, and she was her usual cheerful, snarky, encouraging self. We took this photo together:
I kicked myself for taking a goofy photo. We should have take a photo together – smiling and having fun. Why did we waste that moment? Why is Sarah gone? Why her? What so young? Why now? Why this? Why would someone be taken out of this world when she made this world better every day?
My mind was a cacophony of whys. I couldn’t think and I couldn’t understand. I needed to clear my head and I needed answers. I left work, went home and put on my running clothes.
It wasn’t my fastest time. It wasn’t my longest distance. But it made the most sense of any run I’ve been on. My legs hurt and I kept going. I thought of Sarah – every time I saw her, she encouraged me in my writing and my volunteer work. She was so positive. She was so cheerful. I knew she would be encouraging me while I was running though my neighborhood.
All the why questions were still unanswered when I got back, but it was the best run I’ve had. I ran last night because Sarah couldn’t. I hope she would be proud of me.