Thanks for the Prayers
It’s impossible to know, but I may be one of the most prayed for people in the history of the world. Honestly, although I’m wholly undeserving, you’d have to look long and hard to find someone who has received more prayers than me.
Part of it has to do with how long I’ve been actively dealing with serious illness. My eight-year cancer anniversary is coming up, for I first noticed a problem in May of 2001. The prayers began not too long after that.
It’s not just the length of time, those eight years, of course. It has more to do with the back-and-forth intensity of the battle, all the recurrences, surgeries, radiation, and chemo. Cancer came, but then it went away. It came back after about a year, but then went away again. Then it came back and went away for the third time.
Third time’s a charm, right? Wrong. Cancer hit me for the fourth time in 2004 and they took my arm as a result. And then after three years, cancer came roaring back for the fifth time, and it seems to have no definitive plans to leave.
So I’ve had many crises during the last eight years, and prayers tend to spike during such times, like telephone calls at the end of American Idol. When news gets out that someone is sick or about to have surgery, people pray. What else can we do?
The amount of prayers I’ve received also has to do with the fact that I’m fortunate to know a lot of people. I try to keep up with friends from my hometown, high school, college, and past jobs. I’ve met a lot of people as a result of my current job as a lawyer and my work as a film critic, writer, poet, and band manager. And more importantly, my wife teaches at a middle school and knows half of Norman. She’s also the friendly, outgoing type, and that goes a long way.
I also know a lot of people as a result of my time in church. My wife and I were quite involved at one particular church for many years. LeAnn was on staff briefly and I served in many roles. As a result, we met and became friends with dozens upon dozens of great people from good families, including many church staff members, most of whom are now scattered around the country.
Also, many people have come to know of my situation as a result of my cancer memoir (I Survived Cancer, but Never Won the Tour de France), my website (www.jimchastain.com), and this Life is Real series.
Anyway, all these things, as well as the ongoing madness that is terminal illness, have combined to create a situation that’s ripe for prayer. And as a result, I’ve been blessed with a faithful prayer community, one that would likely register in heavenly record books.
I’ve received a card from a men’s prayer group in Shreveport almost every month for the last seven years. They’ve prayed for me, the card says, usually without further amplification. I’m not exactly sure of my connection to these guys, but I’m thankful for them.
My boss’s Sunday School class has been praying for me diligently over the years. It’s one of the constancies in my life, something I can count on. In this crazy, mixed up world, that matters.
Many other churches pray for me regularly. My parents’ church, for example, and many Norman churches to which we are somehow connected. I’ll receive a card from the staff or a note from a pastor or an email from a church member that tells me they prayed. (One church never sends a card, but does send regular notices about their upcoming money raising efforts– but that’s another topic.)
People stop me all the time and say they’ve been praying for me. Others tell me this via incredible hand-written letters, thoughtful cards, or encouraging email messages. Some have posted nice notes on this blog.
It’s quite a blessing, to know you’re being prayed for. It makes you feel connected, cared for, loved. It helps when you’re dealing with the loneliness and isolation of terminal illness or thoughts of being gone and forgotten.
Still, if I’m to be completely honest, I don’t always know what to do with prayer. After all these years, it still confuses me. Obviously, praying does not always, or even usually, give you the result you want. It often seems like a one-way activity, that is, one side does all the talking while the other does all the listening.
It does help in efforts to decompress, however. And it does help sort things out. Poetry is a big part of my life, and I don’t see an appreciable difference between poetry and prayer in most instances, especially when you consider the Psalms, which are ancient poem/songs. (By the way, if you’re interested in this topic, I’ve written more about prayer in my cancer memoir.)
Even though prayer is more than a little mysterious, when people tell me they’ve been praying for me, or that they pray for me every day, or that they just prayed for me, I’m truly grateful. “Thank you for your prayers,” I say, for I know that a prayer means they care about me and took the time from their busy life to put those concerns into words.
I wanted to do the same thing here. And so, for all of you who’ve prayed for me, thank you! I may not be “well,” in the medical sense, but I’m still here.
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Comments
I really enjoyed the post of the 15th … I’m military, and have deployed to Iraq 3 times, next week I’ll be going to Afghanistan for the first time. People often tell me they’ll pray for me while I’m in the war zone, and while I appreciate the gesture, I’m never sure what to say back to them. I usually say “thanks, that’s nice of you” and if they seem to need more, something like “It certainly can’t hurt!” But it’s like being thanked for being military … I never know quite what to say. But it’s nice to know that people, whether I know them well or not, are thinking of me, caring about my well being, wishing me well. I wish you well, I think of you and your poetry and your prose often, I wish you joy and beauty, and if there was anything I could do to help you, I certainly would. Thanks for your messages out to the world.
Jim,
I’m glad you are still here, I believe that prayers can help, they certainly can’t hurt.
Teddie
A note regarding prayer. James 5:13-16 “13 Is anyone among you suffering? Let him pray. Is anyone cheerful? Let him sing psalms. 14 Is anyone among you sick? Let him call for the elders of the church, and let them pray over him, anointing him with oil in the name of the Lord. 15 And the prayer of faith will save the sick, and the Lord will raise him up. And if he has committed sins, he will be forgiven. 16 Confess your trespasses[e] to one another, and pray for one another, that you may be healed. The effective, fervent prayer of a righteous man avails much.”
Also, I John 5:14,14 “14 Now this is the confidence that we have in Him, that if we ask anything according to His will, He hears us. And if we know that He hears us, whatever we ask, we know that we have the petitions that we have asked of Him.” The key here is God’s will. Who knows God’s will because his ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:9). Our job is to keep the faith.
I’m glad the prayers you’ve been receiving have helped to further your existence thus far.
Thank you for writing this blog.