Having recently been a prisoner in my own house due to medical issues beyond my control, I have little to do all day other then ponder the joke that is my life up to this point. I have no special skills other than being moderately funny and the fact that I’m a relatively nice and thoughtful person. That’s about it as far as I can make out from my journey of daily self reflection coupled with ingesting opiates. No wife or kids. No endless wealth or good looks. Just my own self loathing with generous amounts of opiates as of recent. I think that I have honed my complaining skills though. Sorry you have to read about it but that’s kind of what I’m feeling right now.
In theory being home all day would be fine but it gets boring. I feel like a shut in. I can’t go to work, which is really not as bad as all that. Not being at work is fine by me. What isn’t fine by me is the five holes I’ve had carved into my body within the past month or so which is why I’m not at work. I would rather be off of work doing something fun like, I dunno, not being in pain would be good for starters.
The other thing about having all of this ‘free’ time is that I can only sit just long enough to write this blog which I usually try to keep as interesting as possible but not much is happening that is of interest to anyone I can think of, myself included. I can’t really write anything because I lose my train of thought. It’s odd how constant pain hinders one’s creativity. I wish I could have been spending this time writing a screenplay or making grand plans for my life but whenever I sit to write all that comes out is complaining. That sucks and I apologize for that.
The only thing that has been kind of interesting lately is a trip I took that in retrospect I shouldn’t have taken. I decided today that I would try to venture out of the house and go buy a book I wanted. I hobbled out to my car with the intention of heading to Borders in Norman. Halfway to Norman I realized that was a bad idea. I didn’t take any pain pills as I didn’t want to impair my already questionable driving skills. That was something I should have done, driving hazards be damned.
I arrived at Borders and got out of the car which turned out to be twice as painful an experience as getting into my car was. I hobbled into the store and looked for The 48 Laws of Power by Robert Greene. I read about this book in Rolling Stone recently. I know that taking tips on literature from a magazine with soon to be forgotten pop moroness Fergie on the cover doesn’t say much for me, but we all make mistakes. The book is a compilation of what one needs to do make one’s self become powerful. Jay-Z used this book to help him become successful, so it can’t be all bad. I mean the guy is a millionaire and is dating Beyonce so that’s a good enough endorsement for me.
I found the book and then noticed a book right next to it by the same author entitled The Art of Seduction. That’s when I was faced with quite the decision. Do I get a book that will teach me to how to become powerful or do I get a book that will help me impress ladies? The easy answer is that I should have gotten the seduction book because I need all the help in the area of lady getting I can get. I was standing there with both books in hand. I only had money for one. What to do? Then I realized that power is a pretty attractive quality in a person and if one has power than one need not be adept at the art of seduction. Look at Donald Trump. I bought the power book.
That is all I did today. My weak self went and bought a book about how to be powerful while exuding all the confidence one can muster while in excruciating pain. I was a walking cliche. By walking I mean hobbling and by cliche I mean moron.
After that I came home, took some pain pills and slept like a log. A very tired log with holes in it. I haven’t started the power book yet but I’ll let you all (one person who reads this) know how it goes.
RIGHT NOW
SONG - Love Sends a Little gift of Roses by Benny Goodman off the Yale Archives Vol. 10 - I don’t have a reason for this being the song other than that is the song I’m listening to right now.
MOVIE - Pulp Fiction. Just because it’s good.
CELEBRITY - Bob Barker - The man is a god and you know it.
- Joel David
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