Hola.
I really wish I had something relevant to say. I don’t though. Absolutely nothing. Nada. Nothing going on. This entry is just an exercise in regularity so people won’t think I’ve left them to their own devices. This entry is like virtual Metamucil. I know people are concerned about this because of all the e-mails I don’t get from people wondering where I’ve been. Now I know how MC Hammer feels.
I’ll think of something to make this relevant. Here you go.
There were recently some shootings in Bricktown. Of course, what with people being the way they are, I’ve heard some racist grumblings. “Those black people are ruining Bricktown.” That’s not true. It was some punk thirteen and fourteen year olds with bad attitudes and guns. The color of the skin wasn’t a factor, the attitude and access to firearms sure was though. I’m more scared of some sixteen year old punk white kid wearing a wife beater and super baggy sweatpants sporting a barely grown-in moustache and some mall bought bling than I’ve ever been of a black dude. Ever.
Racism cracks me up. To hate someone for something they can’t help is probably among the more ludicrous things I’ve ever heard. Ok, so it’s DEFINITLEY among the most ludicrous things I’ve ever heard. I find it funny though that all the people who hate someone because of their color, sex, or sexual preference wouldn’t think twice about letting that person help them out of a burning car or out from under some rubble. It’s amazing how quickly a racist, homophobic, sexist moron would accept the help of a black lesbian firefighter if his or her life depended on it.
Stupid racists.
“You ain’t perfect man! Don’t come up in here with all your liberal ways of thinking! Everyone hates something ya tree hugging idealist!” Well yeah. I never claimed to not hate anything, imaginary racist voice in my head. I just hate things that make a little more sense to hate because there is usually a good reason behind it, and not some sort of crazy nut-ball situation that doesn’t exist. I hate my job because it is a soulless and boring existence to have. Totally depressing. I don’t like being depressed hence I don’t like my job. I hate wet socks (uncomfortable), guacamole (tastes like crap), the popularity of Paris Hilton (her popularity reflects the ignorance of the American public at large and their willingness to rally around something that’s pretty and shiny) and finally lists that make no sense (like this one).
I know I’m not going to solve any of the worlds problems, I can merely provide my opinion on them. Maybe I’m wrong. Maybe I should hate things based on color. Like Oranges. They might be delicious but I’ll be damned if I’ll let one date my daughter! No way! Not in my lifetime! See how stupid that sounds? Damn, just stop with the racism. This applies to all races. Everyone has stupid people in their race. Jews, Blacks, Whites, Asians, Muslims, Gays, Breeders, Christians and everyone else who has put themselves into an exclusive little niche just needs to get over it and live in harmony with each other. It’s possible. We can all find way better things to hate. Like Paris Hilton or Toby Keith.
Moving on.
I was at the Taco Bell drive-thru on NW 23rd yesterday and noticed a homeless couple. How did I know they were homeless? The obvious lack of a shower in weeks, the hanging out next to a building and the smoking of cigarettes they found in the trash can next to them were all pretty good indicators. It’s unfair to assume they were homeless based on their appearance though. Perhaps they were just the most frugal people on the planet. For the sake of the story, and fact, I’m gonna say they were homeless.
I rolled down my window to hear their conversation. The guy was angry with the woman for something she said and she got mad at him for something he said in response to her. That’s when I realized that the same conversation probably took place at some point between Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt. “Oh yeah! Well you’re an a-hole!” “Oh yeah?! Well it’s not like you’re perfect!” I basically realized that no matter what your social status, be it alcoholic, unshaven, bum or celebrity superstar, men and women just can’t seem to get along. Same arguments across the status board.
There was no point to that, just a random observation.
Another funny thing was that before the argument the homeless guy had a Taco Bell drink and he offered it to his lady friend and she hesitated before drinking it in a very discerning manner. “This isn’t diet is it? You know I hate diet.” You’re effing homeless! Just shut up and drink it! Then again maybe he had played some trick on her previously where what was in the cup really wasn’t Mountain Dew and more like Bum Dew. Now that I think of it that way her discerning nature doesn’t seem all that out of place. I guess that’s the life one leads when they live behind a check cashing building.
In other useless Joel related drivel…
I was recently made aware by someone that when one Google’s Jennifer Peterson Hind, and looks under images, the first image that comes up is from an image I posted on this here blog a while back. That’s great. I’m now probably on some sort of watch list of people who watch TV shows for kids but don’t have any children of their own. Oh well. That brings the number of watch lists I’m on to a personal record of 7. I can’t tell you what the other six are for. We’ll just say two of them involve Big Bird and the other involves that hot girl from Mythbusters. I need to get less eclectic criteria for women I find attractive.
I’m pretty sure I’m on the Klan’s and some homeless advocacy group’s watch list now too. Oh well. I’m pretty sure I’m in good company. Mel Gibson probably gets lonely being on those watch lists. Take that Braveheart! Snap!
RIGHT NOW
SONG – Crazy by The Raconteurs. It’s the song by Gnarls Barkley but performed by the Raconteurs at a live show. Here’s the link. Thanks to Sarah at www.twoheadedblog.com for this.
http://www.stereogum.com/The%20Raconteurs%20-%20Crazy%20(Live%207-23-06).mp3
MOVIE – Syriana. This movie was awesome and way better than the Matthew McConaughey movie of the same name. What? That was Sahara? Damn you spell check and bad joke writer in my head!
Holla.
- Joel David
www.myspace.com/joeldavidd
joeldavidd@gmail.com
* The Joel David show is on hiatus right now and will return with all new podcasts on September 4th. *