I’m back yo. Actually I didn’t go anywhere other than apathyville which is located on my couch. Population: me.
That was so stupid.
I don’t have any issues to write about as important as inverted Longhorn sticker placement on one’s car or how it’s my fault I broke the law but want to blame it on the state I live in. Just some mundane goings on. I’m gonna stop building this up otherwise you’ll be disappointed when you finish reading this, like that time you read that note you got from your birth parents after twenty years of not knowing you were adopted.
Last night I went to a Redhawks baseball game. Love the Redhawks. Also, it was Thirsty Thursday which means dollar beer. Love the beer. There were a lot of people there, and I’m not sure if they were fans of baseball or rampant alcoholism, but either way I had a good time.
Using my unrivaled powers of observation, I noticed something I would like to address. This is specifically geared towards young guys between sixteen and twenty-one. I say this because I’m pretty sure no one has told them this based on what I saw last night. This is information that can apply to almost anyone, but in this instance it is specifically geared towards this demographic.
Dudes, treat your women better. When you get a little older, you’ll wish you had. See, the girl you’re with right now might not realize it just this second, but give her a few years and she’ll figure out that she can do way better than your trucker hat wearing ass. You aren’t special.
No one cares you shop at Hot Topic and bought a shirt that says ‘I [heart] Hot Moms’. Clever. We get it. However, while you’re busy trying to compensate for a lack of any real wit by shopping for crazy t-shirts that will only impress your equally witless friends, your girlfriend is slowly realizing what a tool you are. It’s gonna happen dude. I promise you.
This doesn’t come from experience, just observation. I’m not saying that your little high school girlfriend won’t accidentally get pregnant and end up having to marry you and be destined to live the sweet life that is being the spouse of an Arby’s shift manager. Anything is possible. But in all reality, while you’re busy laughing it up with your friends and making her hold your drink or cel phone, she’s thinking. Or at least she should be thinking. Thinking about how much better she could do than being a walking cup holder. She’ll slowly realize that she’s not your cel phone caddy. She’ll slowly realize that there is way more to life than fart jokes and your idiot friends.
I’m not saying that girls are faultless. I’m sure girls can be just as clueless as guys but you don’t hear a lot of interesting, attractive girls in their twenties complaining about not being able to find some guy who would makes her carry things for him and treats her like crap. It’s called maturity dudes.
You don’t see a lot of interesting and attractive girls with guys who use the exclamation ‘WHOO!’ as their primary means of emoting. Women aren’t stupid and you aren’t lucky, so take care of the girl you’re fortunate enough to be dating because someday, that same girl will mature and you’ll be lucky to get the time of day from the woman your girlfriend will become. Ain’t gonna happen Chester.
I’m just saying that if you want to keep the prize, you gotta keep playing the game. Keep doing the things for her you did at the beginning of the relationship. Do the things that you never thought you would do in a million years for another human just because it puts a smile on her face. I’ve gift wrapped cheese for god sakes so I know what I’m talking about.
Just be glad you’ve got someone dude, because the odds of you getting someone that cares that much about you again in this life are pretty slim. Stop making her carry your crap. Stop making her walk behind you like she’s an annoyance. Stop being a tool.
Now I’m gonna get my ass kicked by a group of roving morons wearing vintage t-shirts and tattered shorts. Again. Good times.
After the game my friend Greg and I went to Chelino’s. The waitress was none too happy we came in forty-five minutes before closing. This was obvious by her turse attitude and the way she kept glaring at me. I was wearing my ‘I Hate Messicans’ t-shirt so maybe that was the problem.
It also isn’t like we were the only one’s in there either. She was just not very kind. She even started cleaning up our table before we were done eating, removing the butter and other condiments from the table. She even brought the tab almost immediately after bringing the food. She laid it on the table with zero subtlety. Oh well.
I’m not one to complain to one’s boss because I know that waitresses and bartenders work harder than most people do, and everyone has a bad day, but c’mon. I felt bad and probably won’t go back.
Yeah, I’m not sure what the point of that story was either. I’m not sure what the point of any of this is.
-NERD ALERT-
Superman comes out in less than a week! I’m more a of a Batman guy than a Superman guy, but not by that much. Here is how dope this is. I get to go to a preview with my friend Jason on Monday and then 3E got tickets for opening night. I’m going to see it twice in less than a day.
Having said that, I can no longer wonder why I will probably die alone.
RIGHT NOW
SONG – Hypnotize by Notorious B.I.G. Good lord this song is dope. If there was some sort of dope meter it wouldn’t be able to determine the precise dopeness of the song because this song’s dopeness is immeasurable.
MOVIE – Superman - Just cuz fool. That’s why.
Holla.
- Joel David
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