First Step. The week before the game the players and coaches are expected to praise the opposing team like they were the God’s gift to football. Anything short of “gifted” and “talented” and “quick” and “powerful” etc. etc. etc. is considered a slight.

Second Step. The press baits the players/coaches and and verbally pokes them, and prods them, and taunts them, and implies that their team sucks. Eventually, in an unguarded moment, one of the players/coaches says something remotely negative.

Third Step. The reporters throw their hands up in the air and scream “we’re shocked, I tell you, just absolutely shocked” and they run around in circles.

Fourth Step. Everybody then goes and writes a column about it.

Fifth Step. Go to opposing team and confront them with the comment until somebody eventually fires back.

Sixth Step. Repeat Steps 3-5.

Are we having fun yet?

At that point, all members of the press gasp in horor