This might seem petty and it might seem sarcastic, but the following bit of information is the worst news I’ve had all summer.
Rumors are Rob Cohen is planning to remake “The Monster Squad.” This is bad for several reasons:
1) Cohen was the executive producer of the original “The Monster Squad,” and if something ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
2) Cohen’s most current resume includes films like “The Fast and the Furious,” “xXx” and “Stealth.” Shudder.
3) “The Monster Squad” is one of the greatest children adventure movies of all time. I will stand by that statement 130,000 percent. It’s”The Goonies” mixed with a horror theme. Excellent.
4) Remakes are never as good as the originals.
“The Monster Squad” is one of my favorite movies of all time. It was released in 1987 and tells the story of a motley crew of kids that have to battle the forces of horror movie evil. The kids find ways to battle the Wolfman, the Creature from the Black Lagoon, the Mummy, Frankenstein’s Monster and Dracula himself. Holy cow, awesome!
I was about 4 or so when my folks began getting me into films. You know, the Disney and Pooh Bear types. Then one day, while with my dad at the local video rental store, I stumbled across “The Monster Squad” in all its VHS glory. A little scared at first, I picked it up, looked at the neat and (then) terrifying pictures, and decided I had to see it. I fell immediately in love. Of course, I was 4, and 4 year olds don’t typically have taste. But aside from being infatuated with “Star Wars,” I think this was the first time in my childhood life when I made a supreme decision, and it has stuck with me all these years.
That trip back to my abode with “The Monster Squad” in hand was the first of many. I am not lying when I tell you my dad rented the film for me at least three times a month, for a very long stretch of time. Keep in mind, this was way back when rentals - new releases or not - were for one, maybe two, days. Weekends were a blast, and I began quoting the film, and also pretended to be an honorary member of the Squad.
But then I began growing up, and my love for films grew. I own a copy of “The Monster Squad” on VHS, and it doesn’t work anymore. And for the longest time I yearned to watch it again, but I could never find a copy close to home, and once high school hit, I no longer had a VHS player.
And it was several years ago that I began Googling about the film, and I found there were quite a few online petitions to get “The Monster Squad” released on DVD. And almost one year ago to the day, on July 24, 2007, the prayers were answered. While on my way to work, I stopped by Wal-Mart and grabbed my copy. I was the happiest man alive that day, because it brought back so many memories. Looking at the now not-so-scary photos on the DVD cover, I remembered holding my dad’s hand while perusing the video rental store. I remembered wearing myself out with laughter because the Squad finally settled the debate: Wolfman, does indeed, have nards. I remembered being a kid.
There aren’t many times that happens these days.
So while the title of this post is a bit sarcastic, I will admit a huge chunk of me would be disappointed if “The Monster Squad” is remade. It’s a cult classic, a childhood favorite and an all-around great movie. It’s fun, inventive and comical. It’s memorable. It’s “The Monster Squad.”
If you haven’t seen this movie yet, please do.
And please, Mr. Cohen - don’t deface a good thing.
-Richard Hall, NewsOK.com intern