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It’s that time of year.  The lights, the parties, the festivities, the shopping, the trees, the STRESS of the holidays.  Most of us have more to get done than we think we can possibly handle, especially if you add kids into the mix.  But are there ways to at least reduce some of the stress this wonderful season brings? 

The Oklahoma City-County Health Department offers some valuable tips on simple things you can do to make this season a little easier:  

1. Save decorating until a week before the holiday.  Save irreplaceable decorations for later years when children are older.  My son is two, so I won’t be buying any Swarovski Crystal or Tiffany ornaments this year.   

2. Shop ahead, throughout the year, while children are at school or home.  Good advice, unless you’re like me and just HAVE to close the mall down on Christmas Eve, just for the fun of it. 

3. Limit the number of times children stay with babysitters while you attend events.  Not a problem in my house - my babysitter is terminally unavailable.  

4. Avoid forcing a frightened child to sit on Santa’s lap.  Young children often enjoy stories and pictures but the real thing can be overwhelming. I tried to force my son to sit for a Santa picture last year.  All I got was a photo of a distraught toddler with red puffy eyes. 

5. Avoid forcing children to welcome unknown relatives with a kiss or by handing them over to be held by a stranger.  Allow the child time to warm up. Also good advice, unless you’re my mother ‘Gwennie’ and in that case, there will be no warm up time. Because she said so.

 6. If weather permits, encourage outdoor play to release extra energy.  OK, we live in Oklahoma. This is not hard. It won’t be cold until at least Febraury.  

7. Keep routines as normal as possible.  Be sure to expect behavioral changes anytime routines change. I find that this is pretty much a given with a toddler, at any time, in any season, for any reason. 

8. When traveling with a young child, allow extra time on the road.  Take some familiar objects from home.  Establish a routine as close as possible to your regular routine and be assertive with relatives about how you enforce limits with your child. Unless, of course you’re ‘Gwennie’ and under her roof. Then it’s her rules … or else.

9. Limit holiday candy; give healthy treats along with the seasonal goodies.  So pumpkin pie counts as a vegetable, right?

Any more tips you’d like to share? Leave your comments here or email me at the address below.

~Erica Smith

esmith@opubco.com

A lot of mothers — both married and single — sometimes do without to make sure their children get what they need or want.

As a mom, I know this to be true.

A story in today’s New York Times just bears this out.

Moms, it seems, are putting off their own needs to make sure their kids get their Christmas wish lists fulfilled, according to the story “To Buy Children’s Gifts, Mothers Do Without.”

Moms, does this resonate with you?

Do you put off buying things for yourself or doing things for yourself to ensure that your children are taken care of and have what they need?

Do you put off exercise and doing other things for yourself because of your children’s schedule or routine?

Let me know. Send an e-mail with your comments to chinton@opubco.com.  Be sure to include your name, hometown and a phone number where you can be reached. Your views may be used for a future story.

Carla Hinton

My husband keeps saying we’re in a recession, we need to save money, we’re heading toward a depression.

I hear him. I hear the news. I see the effects of the financial crisis around me. People are worried.

Our children are aware, too. They listen to us talk, and I don’t want to scare them, but it’s good they know what’s going on … why Mommy might be a little hesitant to buy a spur-of-the-moment trinket.

Our youngest daughter, after hearing this topic discussed, selected a cheaper party favor for her birthday party. “Is this one OK, Mommy? It’s cheaper.” It kind of broke my heart, but it also made me proud that she is trying to help.

It’s not that our family has made major cutbacks yet. But we are considering our purchases more and thinking, “Do we really need this.”

I had told the girls I would shop for a new dining room table - we’ve used a card table with folding chairs for more than three years. (Some people are shocked by this, but I didn’t want to buy something frivolously) I also told the kids we would even look at some new bedroom furniture.

But this weekend I had second thoughts. … I listened to the news, the bleak picture, the bailout plan. Maybe we should wait just a little while longer to buy new furniture, I told them.

 So, before I went to the grocery store, I clipped my coupons, made my list and tried to keep to the list as much as possible. I canceled a hair appointment. I cooked stew this weekend and made plans to cook more at home.

These are little things, but I’m trying to do my part. And, if my kids can learn something from it, I hope it’s a positive lesson, one about trying to make a difference in our own budget and learning that you don’t always go get something just because you want it. — Linda Lynn 

  Maybe it’s the bright hue of new markers, or the promise of a blank notebook, but I’m unable to resist checking out all the school supplies prominently displayed on store shelves.

I found wire bound notebooks for 10 cents each and got one in each color! I considered a Hannah Montana backpack, but decided it didn’t go with most of my work attire. I don’t remember what to do with a compass, but really really crave one.

Now is a great time to stock up on supplies, for you or your child. I think many stores undercut the prices of many basics just to get you in the door. Of course, they hope you’ll buy other things as well.

What are the best buys you’ve found? Have you splurged any? Comment here or e-mail me at ssimpson@oklahoman.com

Susan Simpson, Education Writer

After the Hollywood Video store near our house went out of business last year, my family quit renting so many movies (Redbox is now our closest outlet and has very limited stock.) But we began buying the movies we knew the kids would watch over and over.

This has worked pretty well. We now have dozens of both classic and recent movies aimed at the under-12 set. A few are regretful purchases (Mimzy and The Wild didn’t inspire repeat viewings) but most will be great to hang onto until whatever new technology completely overtakes DVD. (I’ve only recently completed my long good-bye to the VCR.)

Occasionally, we go to a REAL MOVIE THEATRE and experience the big screen, buttered popcorn and all. This is a rather expensive way to spend every weekend for a family of four.

Last week, I took my 5-year-old to see Kung Fu Panda — how could we not after all the McDonald’s toys? — and she became restless within 30 minutes of its start. The popcorn and my pleading convinced her to stick with it through the end. I liked the movie and thought the animation was well done. Will we buy this movie when it comes out on DVD? Probably not.

This weekend I really want to go see Wall-E, Pixar’s newest animated feature. It’s gotten spectacular reviews from adults and children alike. I’ll take my 5-year-old and her sister, 10. I’m already planning to totally love the movie and think my girls will too. And yes, I already plan to buy it on DVD, I’m that convinced it’ll be a classic.

Maybe it’s because Wall-E is like my outdated VCR. Still functional, but not very sleek and swift. 

Susan Simpson 

Most of the time when I go out, whether it is to the mall, or grocery store, or Target, it is just my son and me.  He is my little “shopper.”  I started him at a young age - 1 week old.  I have a niece just a tad older than Hunter and her parents can’t take her anywhere.  But if Hunter even just sees a mall, he’ll start yelling “SHOP SHOP!!”  It really is a mom’s dream.

The only hard thing about just the two of us shopping together is trying to do the little things a third person would normally do, like holding the door open as I’m pushing Hunter’s stroller through.  Or balancing the food tray on one hand and using the other to try to steer him toward a clean table in the food court. Or trying to squeeze us and his stroller into a small bathroom stall because I don’t have someone to watch him while I go. 

So when people hold a door open or just help in some other little way, they probably don’t think much of it. But to me, it means the world.  I was in Wal-Mart over the weekend for my weekly huge grocery run.  Hunter was strapped into his shopping cart cover (best invention ever!) and I had just unloaded the bags into the trunk.  His shoes were caught and I was struggling to get him out with one hand, and in my other hand, I had my purse and the bag with bread to put in the front seat.  Right then a very nice man stopped and held the end of the cart so I could free Hunter. Then he took the cart down to the cart “corral” for me.  He only had one bag of his own, but took the time to walk past his own car with my cart to put it back for me. 

He probably never gave it a second thought, but for me, it meant that I didn’t have to struggle with the cart for five minutes and get frustrated.  It meant that I got home those five minutes quicker and used them to enjoy the company of my little “shopper.”  

-Erica Smith