Can 2-year-olds be bullies?
It’s a hard concept to grasp, but seemingly it can be true.
Objectively, I would have to say my 2-year-old son’s demeanor is very mild. He is affectionate and already demonstrates a certain compassion for others, as simple as it is. I have been very lucky that he has never taken out frustration or anger in a physical way – never a biter or a hitter.
These qualities also may make him a target of bullying. In his class, he has a friend who is bigger than him (my son is small for his age), more outspoken and a bit aggressive. I’m going by what I’ve seen myself and what other parents have said. The interaction between the two boys is starting to worry me though, because my son is now reenacting his negative encounters with this child, over and over again.
I’ll pick him up from daycare and about 5 minutes into the ride home, I’ll hear him in the back seat reliving the day’s events. “No No! No push Hunter! Be nice, (child’s name), be nice!” or “No hit Hunter – go time out, (child’s name)!” At first I thought it was an idle situation, but lately this is an everyday occurrence. I’m worried that it can scar him in a way that may, in turn, make him aggressive, or set him up for a lifetime of being a target of bullies.
One thing I can’t really do is talk to this child’s mom. We are friends, and I don’t want to see a friendship go sour over this and there is no real delicate way to bring it up. The daycare teachers are giving the boy time outs so I can’t say they’re not doing their part.
I’m not sure where to go from here. If anyone has suggestions, please let me know. I would love to hear some!
~Erica Smith
The Lessons Start Early
First day of school Lesson No. 1:
Be mindful where you park. In the rush of parents walking their children into school this morning, my car was blocked by another vehicle. Thanks to the kind dad that helped me maneuver out of the tight spot!
Lesson No. 2: No photos please! My daughter was not at all interested in having her picture taken. How will I scrapbook this momentous day? I’ll try again tomorrow.
Lesson No. 3: Don’t forget the ice pack in the sack lunch. I did and then had to remove an item that needed to be kept cool. Luckily that still left a cookie and a peanut butter sandwich (crusts removed.)
Lesson No. 4: Take a deep breath. Smile big when you wave goodbye. Don’t cry until you get to the car. You’ll be stuck there for a while anyway.
Susan Simpson, Mom of a KINDERGARTENER! (Can you believe it?)
City folk go camping — sort of
My family has been camping for the past week.
Not outside of course. It’s hot there! But in a tent in the middle of the living room.
My 5-year-old has been learning about camping at preschool, and so we thought it’d be fun to actually break out the tent stored in an unopened box in our attic.
Putting the thing together was fun for my husband because there were no directions. Bravely, he managed and we soon had a bigger-than-I-expected igloo-shaped domicile. My daughter collected an array of snacks for our “camping” trip and I turned on the Discovery Channel (the TV was right there) to find some scenery.
Despite the whirl of the ceiling fan, it was fun to imagine we were actually on a great adventure. Our dogs became “bears” prowling for snacks. We made fire-free S’mores with chocolate marshmallows and Ritz crackers.
But did we sleep there? Of course not, the floor is hard after all.
Next my daughter wants to go fishing. Maybe we’ll turn the bathtub into a “pond.” Do goldfish crackers float?
Susan”Scared of Mosquitoes” Simpson
Short week can mean big headache
Lately, there’s been a lot of talk about state employees moving to four-day work weeks, saving them a day of gas money and in some cases, easing energy costs to operate buildings.
In theory, it sounds great. Work four 10-hour days and then get a three-day weekend. Who wouldn’t love that?
But for parents that depend on child care, it can be a nightmare. Many daycares charge the same whether your child is there four days or five. And not all are open long enough hours for parents who travel any distance to work.
I could work 7 to 5, but if daycare doesn’t open until 7 a.m. or later, I’d never make it to my desk on time. Plus, I really wouldn’t want my kid to be class for 10 hours each day.
What do you think? Are four-day and 40-hour work weeks a fit for your family?
Susan Simpson
Moving up is hard to do
I’ve been through a lot of changes with my son and he has accepted each one without resistance and with a big smile. I always thought that no matter what, I could make anything better, because, well, I am Mom and that’s my job.
My 2-year-old has been promoted recently at daycare. He has been promoted a few times in his 2 years … from the newborn class, to the first toddler class, to the second. But in his new 2-year-old class, he is having a very hard time and it leaves me not knowing how to make it better.
He used to love going to “school.” In fact, some days, I couldn’t get him to leave with me at the end of the day. He talked about all his friends on our way there and tried to tell me about his day on the way home. He woke up excited to go every morning.
Now, it is a struggle to get him out of his crib. He doesn’t want to eat. He is silent the entire drive there and when he gets there, he reaches for his old classroom’s door and starts screaming and crying when I bring him into the new room.
His teacher said that a few children have had a hard time adjusting, even though they are with their friends. They have a lot less freedom and more structure, to prepare them for preschool. She said it should get better in a few weeks, but any parent knows how hard it is to leave a crying child who is reaching for you, to makes things better.
I feel helpless, but I know it has to get better.
Today I left him crying again, but just as I left, his teacher ran out to catch me so that I could see him through the window. He had stopped crying and was sitting down at the table, painting me a picture. The roles reversed … today, my little man made me feel better.
-Erica Smith
My son did WHAT??
We all have that nightmare … that we go to pick up our child at daycare or school and we get “the talk” … the talk about something horribly wrong they did …
As many other parents here, I have my 2-year-old son in the OPUBCO Child Development Center. Friday afternoon, I leave work and go pick him up. As I walk in among other parents, I hear the lady at the front desk tell the others ”we had a fire drill today.” How nice. They really take the kids’ safety seriously over there. Fire drills and tornado drills. Makes my day at work more at ease knowing my boy is in such a safe environment.
So I walk back to his classroom to pick him up. The two girls who take care of his class, God love ’em, gave me “the look.” It’s the look that you know something’s coming, but you’re not sure what. All you know is that it won’t be good.
“Hunter pulled the fire alarm today.”
“My son did WHAT??”
“He pulled the fire alarm today. We had to call off the fire trucks and the entire building had to evacuate.”
“My son did WHAT??”
I was shocked, yes, but I must admit a part of me wanted to laugh hysterically. Of course, I tried my best to maintain my composure, however, as pulling fire alarms is NO laughing matter. Even if the accused is only 30 inches tall and … can he really reach the alarm? Apparently so.
“We told him not to touch it anymore. We were all quite startled when the alarm went off. But we looked over and Hunter was walking away from it, with a look of ‘Uh-oh’ on his face.”
After many apologies, I scoop up my little innocent toddler (maybe not so innocent after all) and we leave the classroom. As I’m about to break free … the infant-room teacher sees me in the hall and says, excitedly, “Did you hear that Hunter pulled the fire alarm?!?”
Yes, I did. As I’m sure anyone within a half-mile radius did too.
-Erica Smith
