What is it with the time between 6 p.m. and 9 p.m.? It totally moves at warp speed? Like it’s running for its life from rabid Russian mob bosses carrying venomous snakes and that dancing baby from “Ally McBeal.” Noon to 3 certainly doesn’t move that fast. Noon to 3 is like 6 to 9’s hippie cousin. I need noon to 3 from 6 to 9. Noon to 3 would sit lazily in his beanbag chair reading Daniel Quinn books and coloring with 6 to 9’s 3-year-old, while answering the little kid’s rapid fire questions all cool, calm and collect. Hey hippie cousin why are you wearing Jesus sandals? Because they are made of hemp and it is sustainable. What is sustainable? It means that it will keep things going and if we are not sustainable then we’ll use up every thing and there won’t be any fish left in the ocean for your grandkids to eat sushi. Do you like to fish hippie cousin? Sure I like to fish little dude. Will you take me fishing hippie cousin? Where will we go? What color will your fishing pole be? How come that beanbag chair is purple? …
6 to 9 tends to be irritable, short-tempered and just plain ugly. 6 to 9 says stop asking me questions I need to get X done. I don’t have time to color right now we have to be at X place by X time. No I can’t go fishing with you, I have to go to work. Now go to bed.
But why? Why on God’s beautiful green earth does 6 to 9 move so incredibly fast? It takes everything in me to get home, food down my kid’s throats, baths, books, some semblance of play in and to bed before 9. And really a 3-year-old should probably be in bed by 8.
Some nights I get them all tucked into bed and realize that we didn’t even play. We didn’t laugh. We didn’t just do nothing together. No one chased anyone around the couch and down the hall. No one found a frog or firefly. No one did something for the very first time.
So, Universe here is my plea. Please speed up noon to 3 because you are aware of how much nothing I can cram into that span of time and put the breaks on 6 to 9 so that I have more time to do nothing with my family.