What number changed your life?
I have always said that the first child doesn’t change much, but the second child changes everything. And I’ve heard that the third child really throws a hitch in things – a three bedroom house and standard-sized vehicle just don’t cut it after that.
For my husband and I one child didn’t really change anything. We still went hiking, biking, traveled and hung out with our friends, who most had their first child about the same time. We out-fitted ourselves with some cool new gear and just continued our lives as normal.
We’d sit at a restaurant eating leisurely dinners with friends and when it was time for the baby to eat, I’d feed her because you don’t get crusty looks in Colorado for nursing your baby at the dinner table … or anywhere really including sitting at the bar where it is not illegal for a baby to be. A couple of weeks after our first was born we drove to Moab, Utah to hike around Arches National Park with my mom. I attached a cart to the back of my bike for my commute to work and she rode and smiled. We took her to the movie theatre. She slept through church service and post church service breakfast. She slept through the night at six weeks. Of course I understand that I had a very easy baby – she didn’t even cry when she was born, which is exactly what made all this possible. And right now if you are saying to yourself, “that is so unfair,” my kid peed on my rotisserie chicken last Sunday so don’t tell me what is not fair. I’m getting mine now.
I was reading George Lang’s column today about Mates of State, who my husband first heard about in 2003 from a good friend and trusted source of good music information, fell in love with and very soon after decided that we too could be a musical traveling couple.
I can understand why my husband might think that. Mates of State are a married former teacher and cancer researcher who did so well creating music that they were able to quit their day-jobs to pursue it full time. Now I’m all about quitting my day-job to travel the world, I just don’t want to have to sing to do it. But I can definitely see how he could dream that we might be them. They are easy to relate to. Mates of State got married in 2001 and so did my husband and I. They have a 4-year-old and a baby; we have an almost 4-year-old and a baby. They used to live in Lawrence, Kansas and so did my husband. So our lives appear to be on similar paths or at least it is fun to imagine they are anyway … Them with their glamorous rock ‘n’ roll lifestyle and us with our suburban, day job having, make our kids laugh with backporch sing-a-longs lifestyle. You can see the similarity there can’t you?
So I found it interesting that they said that having the first child threw everything out of wack, but the second child smoothed everything out.
I found it completely opposite. Maybe it is different for rock stars. How did it work for you? And please indicate if you are a rock star … just for reference.
- Lindsey Johnson
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