
My family and I just returned from our vacation in Florida, where we visited my husband’s family, frolicked at Indian Rocks Beach and traipsed around Disney World for hours. It was fun, except for the sunburns and the stolen (and later recovered) stroller and all the wonderfully goofy things that go wrong on a halfway cross-country trip.
We learned a lot, so in the spirit of sharing, elementary school and BAM’s Blog, my older son Chris, 13, and I present the 10 entertaining things we learned on summer vacation:

1. It really is a Magic Kingdom, especially when it rains. So, it’s incredibly overly commercialized and has a line for everything (including the parking shuttles), but Disney World really is magical. It’s hard to feel the magic when the weather is hot enough to melt the asphalt, but if a big thunderstorm rolls through the alleged Sunshine State and cools everything down, you can easily fit in 16 attractions, multiple shopping sprees and a fireworks display into a 13-hour visit.
Yes, we were crazy enough to spend 13 hours at Disney World, but we really did have a great time, especially since it was the first visit for Chris and Gabe, who’s only 19 months old after all, and for me, since we went to Disneyland when I was a kid.
Space Mountain is still a thrill ride, and the Big Thunder Mountain Railroad coaster is lots of fun, too. My husband got to return to Snow White’s Scary Adventure, a ride that made an impression on him as a child. Despite the heat, the boys really liked climbing, running and exploring on Tom Sawyer’s Island.
They might take away our personalized Mickey Mouse ears, but they will never take our memories.

2. It’s not so annoying after all. The song “It’s a Small World” used to set my teeth on edge - and it might still if you played it for me today - but I happily listened to it for 15 solid minutes while watching Gabe the Babe gaze in wonder at all the animatronic glory of the classic Disney ride.
It was nearly as cute as his continuous pleas of “please” while we were waiting in line for “The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh” ride. He just couldn’t wait to get in that giant honey pot and see Pooh, Piglet and friends.
But nothing will compare to the expression on his face when he got to meet the Buzz Lightyear outside “Buzz Lightyear’s Space Ranger Spin.” He could barely take his eyes off the costumed character long enough to get his picture take. (He also enjoyed the ride, but not as much as I did. I scored 36,500 points with my blaster, and that was with a toddler steering my ship.)

3. “Rock Band” vs. “Guitar Hero.” “Rock Band” wins! While visiting my husband’s Florida cousins, the youngsters of the bunch, Kyle, 21, and Taylor, 16, helped us occupy ourselves during the rainy weather by treating us to hours of XBox 360-induced instrumental entertainment. It was my first time to play either “Rock Band” or any of the “Guitar Hero” games. (We played “GH” 2 and 3. Why can’t I ever start at the beginning of a video game franchise?)
Although “GH” had some better song choices - including “Trogdor” - I preferred “Rock Band,” since it was a little less difficult and you could get more people involved. My husband Patrick showed some mad vocal skills on Faith No More’s “Epic.” Even Gabe played the drums a few times, although he wasn’t exactly plugged in at the time.

4. I have a whole new respect for the Scorpions. After playing “RB” and “GH,” I feel I should issue an apology to every rock band I’ve ever made fun of that actually plays or played its own instruments. I knew I couldn’t play an instrument before, but I definitely got humbled several times trying to master different songs on these games.
Tip: If you are playing one of these games, try recruiting someone who actually plays an instrument to bail you out of the Sucksville Jail. Taylor plays guitar, and his star power paid my bond many times. Plus, Patrick, Chris and the cousins have crack gameplay skills, which also come in handy.
I had no idea that the Scorpion’s “Rock You Like a Hurricane” had such an intricate baseline. The Strokes’ “Reptilia” sounds really brilliant, and is actually brilliant in its simplicity. And Heart’s “Barracuda” is just as impressive as it sounds.

5. So Dr. Moreau wasn’t that crazy. Just as engrossing as the musical games was the creature-creating demo for the game “Spore.” We spent hours designing all manner of many-eyed, multi-limbed, crazy-colored critters, which we forced to dance, sing and produce babies for our sick enjoyment.
You can go to www.spore.com to download the demo, but be warned, it is amazingly addictive. There’s just something about building an entire zoo of wild animals; I understand now why Dr. Seuss wrote and illustrated so many books.

6. Johnny Depp makes everything better, but Eddie Murphy doesn’t necessarily. My husband and I found the “Pirates of the Caribbean” ride to be much changed from our childhood Disney visits. Mostly, that involved incorporating Capt. Jack Sparrow from the movies into the storyline. Watching the wily Capt. Jack pop up throughout the tour was really entertaining.
But I was relieved to find that the “newly enhanced” “Haunted Mansion” ride did not incorporate Eddie Murphy, who is in way too many “family-friendly” projects in my opinion. I’m not totally sure what they changed on this ride, but it was terrific fun for the whole fam.

7. Unfortunately, Hilary Swank doesn’t necessarily make things better, either. The 3,000-mile car ride to Florida offered adequate time for me to finally read the book “P.S. I Love You.” I reviewed the DVD a few weeks ago and found the movie to have numerous flaws - the most notable being its two-time Oscar-winning star’s inability to do anything remotely light-hearted.
But reading Cecelia Ahern’s novel made me realize that the filmmakers made numerous changes to the story, none of which seemed to enhance it in the slightest. If the premise - a young widow gets help through her grief from a series of letters her husband wrote before he died - sounds interesting to you, do yourself a favor and read the book.

8. “WALL-E” is still wonderful. My husband and I took the boys to see “WALL-E” on the way back home, and I could hardly wait to share it with them after giving it a glowing, four-star review. Chris and Gabe both got posters from the press day I attended, and they got their pick of the new robot-related merchandise at Disney World.
Amazingly, I actually liked the movie better the second time I saw it, and they all loved it, too.

9. There’s more spitting than you might think at Disney World. Chris and I counted three attractions that featured this rather icky habit. The tiki statues outside the “Enchanted Tiki Room” doubled as sprayers, while the giant golden camels at “The Magic Carpets of Aladdin” would hose you in mid-flight.
But the biggest violater: “Stitch’s Great Escape,” which is undoubtedly the weirdest “attraction” at Disney World. It isn’t really a ride, it’s more of a “special” effects experience in which the harnesses bring you the sounds and, unfortunately, smells and spit of Stitch causing mayhem at an intergalatic prison. Not only do you get to smell a chili dog burp, you also get splashed with Stitch-spit multiple times! This movie, one of the best non-Pixar Disney flicks of the last decade, deserves a better attraction.

10. Elvis has left the building, but you’ll pay plenty to get in anyway. We traveled through Memphis to and from Florida, and we discussed stopping at Graceland after we passed by it on the way there. We were all set to see the King’s castle until we looked up the price on the Internet. The cost just to get in the door and take the one-hour self-guided tour: $27 per adult. (Chris could have entered for the bargain price of $24.30.)
I’m definitely an Elvis fan, but this seems excessive to visit a house. Maybe it’s my Disney experience talking, but is there a Elvis-theme roller coaster inside? (Maybe even one that showers you with his spit?) Can you get your photo taken with his ghost? We decided our money would be better spent on something like an Elvis album or DVD. After all, the King really lives on in his music, not the jungle room.
-BAM